Nose to the Ground - #8

DEAR ROW:

I used to be a pretty spirited teenager and twenty-something activist ready to pounce on the nearest or latest social injustice. I went to law school with high hopes of alleviating any kind of social injustice for good. Naïve. Definitely. Arrogant. Of course. Elijah-complex from the Bible, thinking I’m the only one who cares enough to right wrongs. Had it badly then. I often had it so badly I was stifled by my overwhelming righteous indignation. I suppose then it was just indignation.

Law school was supposed to fix that. Give me the tools to put my righteous indignation into actionable steps. It didn’t. It only confirmed how much I abhorred these institutions/systems that claim to be working for the betterment of society. I couldn’t run from the courtroom fast enough and back into another graduate program. I became Superman and Flash, flying and running, running and flying all the way to O-hi-o.

And as I find myself in a program that affords me the avenues to explore my passion and the tools to advocate for alleviating social injustice, albeit through a different lens…there’s still something missing.

Picking up a serving spoon and spooning a heavy serving of mashed potatoes on a displaced person’s plate is direct. It’s instant. Opening up my MacBook Pro. Finding my Final Draft file. And typing dialogue for a made up character seems mighty remote from that displaced person’s talking stomach.

I miss the human interaction that advocacy often brings. I miss being an ear to someone to share their stories with. I miss helping put a smile on a child’s face by playing a competitive game of Checkers with them. I miss lobbying for a cause for a local community.

And I know. All of this can still be done. Right now. I can partake in all of the above this minute. But I often grapple with efficiency v. over extending myself. Finding that balance. And isn’t my writing eventually going to help someone? Say something?

Eventually? I want do something now!

Well…There is a need for diversity awareness and sensitivity in my school program (in most schools, in most office environments, in most cities, in most nations, etc.). 

[Cue the melodramatics.]

Chanel: Could an opportunity for advocacy been staring you right in your face, but you've been too self-absorbed and unwilling to shoulder any blame, that you've pushed any idea of you being a helpful conduit for eventual progress aside? 

Self: Yes, girl. How are you just now realizing this?

Chanel: ...

Self: Shame. You don't even respond to yourself. Well, did you at least read Shonda Rhimes’s recent comment about the DGA diversity award she was given? They still don’t understand that this kind of award only highlights the lack of_____ in their institutions? 

[Cut the melodramatics.]

This is how much I need to put my nose back to the ground and advocate for something, Row. My internal dialogues are now appearing without warning in public. Not good.

Write me back, 

Chanel
__________________________________________________________________________

DEAR CHANEL:

Josh Whedon has a similar response when he’s continually asked why he makes strong female protagonists and female centric content (Buffy the TV show) – he always replies with… the fact that you ask me this question every time I get interviewed is why I do it. 

I think that if you’re being asked or provoked to ‘represent’ and be a focal point for diversity – you should take it… it may feel tokenesque, but if it means progress, why not? While you might be overextended, when in your life is it ever BAD to be busy? Are you afraid you’ll suffer exhaustion and be checked into a rehab center? Lol. You’re in graduate school, you’re in academia and it’s basically the best learning and growing platform you will have. I say just stay busy and use any outlet you can for exposure and use every tool, trait, angle to your advantage.

I think that your writing accompanied by good press/publicity can be a fantastic way to bridge the outreach gap you feel from writing on your computer to real interpersonal interaction. I agree that a righteous naiveté without direction is dangerous, but so are silent protests through words that will never get read or produced/published. It's just as ineffectual.

I think you’re plenty forthright to lead the charge. I think your demeanor of being intellectually and selectively vocal is exactly why you were probably moved in this direction. The question of diversity is silly. I applied for a program through a Big Network and the essay question was “Describe how your diversity has worked to your advantage” – which I found ridiculous because the program was targeted to diverse individuals – so clearly it couldn’t have helped us THAT much if the network created and is implementing the program… 

In closing, I say keep on grinding and pressing forward but don’t forget to pick your head up once in a while and look around. You might be grinding that nose for so long you don’t realize how far ahead you’ve gotten.

--Row